Friday, December 27, 2013

ABOUT THE RICH YOUNG MAN AND MISSIONARIES
 
 
This is the Thursday after Christmas, and I am back in the ERC after two days of no work here.  On Tues., Christmas Eve, my companion, Sister Clark, and I made everything ready for Christmas.  Our apartment was just decked out with lovely flowers (hers and mine from loving family) and Christmas decorations, even a small loaded tree!.  We prepared food for our party on Christmas afternoon and to bring to the Mills that evening.  I woke early and took a nice walk on the trails at the Spring Preserve (the closest thing to nature I have here), and we both talked to family.  I cleaned up my room and bathroom and vacuumed the house, etc.  We had re-arranged the furniture on Saturday for the party, and it all looked nice and homey.  I was able to talk to some of my children as well, which always is wonderful.  I even went out into our courtyard and got in their nice hot tub (pool, really).  I tried to put my feet in the pool, but it was really frigid and my toes were like ice in seconds.  Anyway, after a good day, we picked up Pam, our friend and neighbor, and went to the Mills" house for dinner. They were so gracious and welcoming and seemed genuinely happy to have us there.  She had made some wonderful clam chowder and turkey noodle soups and bread and salad (along with our salad which we brought).  I was chagrinned when I arrived at the door, because as I walking along the sidewalk, the bottle of dressing for the salad just slipped through my fingers and crashed on the cement.  They were so nice about it and Brother Mills helped me get it cleaned up.  Sister Mills is the early  morning seminary teacher and Brother Mills is the Stake Executive Secretary, and they are both dedicated and consecrated saints, always giving and helping where they can.  Their wonderful teenage daughter is such a great Church member and will be going on her mission when she turns 19 next spring, something she has been planning for all her young life.  Her brother is already in Korea on a mission, and the parents will be also going as soon as they are able (next summer after their daughter goes).  What a great family!!.    That experience and my reading of Scriptures the next morning, Christmas, gave me some pause for thought.  The Mills were comfortable, but by, no means,  well off.  Yet they never considered that they wouldn't give all they could in behalf of the Savior (just as they gave us the best of food and sent us home with a very nice gift as well).

It is now Fri., and Noelle and Dane are coming down to visit me tomorrow--and I will also get to go to St. George to attend the farewell of his grandparents.  These are two of the happiest and most fun, as well as the most consecrated, people I know personally.  They are in their 80s and have served four full-time missions (or this will be their fourth, I'm not sure, but you get the idea).  Because of the season and the admonition of our mission president, I have been reading the New Testament, and I was touched especially by the Spirit when I re-read the story of the rich young man who had kept the commandments from his youth.  As I read, I thought of the good people who give so much of themselves, consecrate their lives to serve the Savior and their fellow man.  I wonder if there was a type in the story of us as "good" members of the Church.  Most members try to keep the commandments  and live good lives, but how many are really ready to give all--all their time, talents, money, everything they have in possessions in His service?  I think of the prophets, old and today, and a few people I have met since I've come here (including the Ahlanders).  It is becoming clear to me that there is a whole level of commitment that He would have me want to reach.  It does, admittedly, make me a little uneasy.  I am coming to like my mission in many ways and I know that He wants me to be here, but, after I serve the best I can and try to be meek and put up with all the difficult things that seem to be ongoing, I was looking forward to finishing (with a sigh of relief) and returning to my former wonderful life with some added dedication and as a better person, still serving where I can, but not away from home 100% of the time.  I hope He doesn't want me to do that, but I am afraid to ask Him.  Yet, the people I love and admire most in history, including and especially the Savior (just reading the Gospels helped me realize how totally dedicated His life was and is to Heavenly Father's children--every day, every hour with no respite (except His time with Satan!))--all have spent not just years but many years immersed in His work.  Could I come home and go again on another mission, and another, and another, like some seem able to do?  Honestly, no, I am so afraid to disappoint Him, but right now, I could go home and never do this again.  Perhaps, I will feel differently in nine months or so, or maybe I will learn that that is not His will for me after all, but I will continue to pray to learn His will to be revealed to me in His time and as I am ready to receive it.

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