BAD START == GOOD END,  MORE ADVENTURES IN THE ERC

 

 

It never fails!  Last night was a terrible night for sleep.  I slept from about 9:30 PM to 12:00 AM and could not get back to sleep the rest of the night.  I was so anxious--my anxiety level reached new heights!   I had had a wonderful weekend with Noelle and Dane coming down to be with me on Sat,  after which Noelle spent the night with me.  We got up early to drive up to St. George to go to the Maes' (Dane's grandparents) farewell, which was so great, and stayed for the whole block.  I was so glad we did, as the meetings were wonderful--their ward is filled with seasoned dedicated and strong members of the Church (I'm sure they all were, are now, or will be again, missionaries!).  After having lunch with the family, I drove back to Las Vegas.  Somehow, I felt a bit depressed after coming home, which hasn't happened before when family has left, and then, not a lot of sleep.  I was sure it would be a not-so-great day in the center, but was I ever wrong!.  There were some very special and well-loved children of our Heavenly Father who came in seeking employment and I got to meet and register some of them.  Shirley and Brittany were both non-members and I talked to them about some employment resources we encourage our clients to use before we help them register.  Because there were two of them, Sister Clark helped to register Shirley, while I worked with Brittany.  She was very thankful and she hugged me as she left.  I feel confident that she will come back in and I will have a chance to ask her if she "would be willing" to learn more about the Church, but it just wasn't the right timing.  Marcus, who seemed to have less than no knowledge about the computer (me at my worst!) was very nice and, also a non-member, expressed interest in the Church (again, he said he would be back and was grateful).  Brother Lamos, mentioned elsewhere in this blog as someone I helped find a good job (not really, but he gave me credit) came in for help with his daughter, Alessandra, who was a darling 18 year old looking for her first job.  The icing on the cake was a precious young woman, Kamikia, who I registered and had time to talk about the Church.  After helping her, I mentioned how everything there was from member donations, including us volunteers because of our love for the Savior.  She said she  really wanted to know more and even join the Church when she can.  When she left, she gave me the sweetest longest hug and we both felt the Spirit unto tears.  All I could think of was that she would have a great blessing of becoming a "fellow citizen with the Saints and of the household of God."  What an honor to be able to serve these great people in this small way!

ABOUT THE RICH YOUNG MAN AND MISSIONARIES

 

 

This is the Thursday after Christmas, and I am back in the ERC after two days of no work here.  On Tues., Christmas Eve, my companion, Sister Clark, and I made everything ready for Christmas.  Our apartment was just decked out with lovely flowers (hers and mine from loving family) and Christmas decorations, even a small loaded tree!.  We prepared food for our party on Christmas afternoon and to bring to the Mills that evening.  I woke early and took a nice walk on the trails at the Spring Preserve (the closest thing to nature I have here), and we both talked to family.  I cleaned up my room and bathroom and vacuumed the house, etc.  We had re-arranged the furniture on Saturday for the party, and it all looked nice and homey.  I was able to talk to some of my children as well, which always is wonderful.  I even went out into our courtyard and got in their nice hot tub (pool, really).  I tried to put my feet in the pool, but it was really frigid and my toes were like ice in seconds.  Anyway, after a good day, we picked up Pam, our friend and neighbor, and went to the Mills" house for dinner. They were so gracious and welcoming and seemed genuinely happy to have us there.  She had made some wonderful clam chowder and turkey noodle soups and bread and salad (along with our salad which we brought).  I was chagrinned when I arrived at the door, because as I walking along the sidewalk, the bottle of dressing for the salad just slipped through my fingers and crashed on the cement.  They were so nice about it and Brother Mills helped me get it cleaned up.  Sister Mills is the early  morning seminary teacher and Brother Mills is the Stake Executive Secretary, and they are both dedicated and consecrated saints, always giving and helping where they can.  Their wonderful teenage daughter is such a great Church member and will be going on her mission when she turns 19 next spring, something she has been planning for all her young life.  Her brother is already in Korea on a mission, and the parents will be also going as soon as they are able (next summer after their daughter goes).  What a great family!!.    That experience and my reading of Scriptures the next morning, Christmas, gave me some pause for thought.  The Mills were comfortable, but by, no means,  well off.  Yet they never considered that they wouldn't give all they could in behalf of the Savior (just as they gave us the best of food and sent us home with a very nice gift as well).

It is now Fri., and Noelle and Dane are coming down to visit me tomorrow--and I will also get to go to St. George to attend the farewell of his grandparents.  These are two of the happiest and most fun, as well as the most consecrated, people I know personally.  They are in their 80s and have served four full-time missions (or this will be their fourth, I'm not sure, but you get the idea).  Because of the season and the admonition of our mission president, I have been reading the New Testament, and I was touched especially by the Spirit when I re-read the story of the rich young man who had kept the commandments from his youth.  As I read, I thought of the good people who give so much of themselves, consecrate their lives to serve the Savior and their fellow man.  I wonder if there was a type in the story of us as "good" members of the Church.  Most members try to keep the commandments  and live good lives, but how many are really ready to give all--all their time, talents, money, everything they have in possessions in His service?  I think of the prophets, old and today, and a few people I have met since I've come here (including the Ahlanders).  It is becoming clear to me that there is a whole level of commitment that He would have me want to reach.  It does, admittedly, make me a little uneasy.  I am coming to like my mission in many ways and I know that He wants me to be here, but, after I serve the best I can and try to be meek and put up with all the difficult things that seem to be ongoing, I was looking forward to finishing (with a sigh of relief) and returning to my former wonderful life with some added dedication and as a better person, still serving where I can, but not away from home 100% of the time.  I hope He doesn't want me to do that, but I am afraid to ask Him.  Yet, the people I love and admire most in history, including and especially the Savior (just reading the Gospels helped me realize how totally dedicated His life was and is to Heavenly Father's children--every day, every hour with no respite (except His time with Satan!))--all have spent not just years but many years immersed in His work.  Could I come home and go again on another mission, and another, and another, like some seem able to do?  Honestly, no, I am so afraid to disappoint Him, but right now, I could go home and never do this again.  Perhaps, I will feel differently in nine months or so, or maybe I will learn that that is not His will for me after all, but I will continue to pray to learn His will to be revealed to me in His time and as I am ready to receive it.

 

 

OUR CHRISTMAS PARTY

 

 

Yesterday, we had our party for all the senior missionaries.  Only one couple, the medical missionaries (doctor and nurse), were unable to come, so there were nine of us altogether, including Pam.  I cooked a turkey all night (very tender) and we had lots of other things prepared.  The guests also brought food contributions and we had two put together long tables (from Pam and Sister Clark) for a dining table (ours was used for the food).  Sister Splain and Sister Houseman, the other sister missionaries, Brother and Sister Sudweeks and Brother and Sister Hunt, both couples of whom work in the Mission office and Pam came to partake, and it was quite a fun gathering.  We ate and talked and then played games.  Brother Sudweeks had us  play a version of "What would you do if...?" which was fun, I led them in the picture/caption game, where we fold up the paper and come out with funny combinations (not as funny as it is when our family plays this--they were too literal).  And then, we started to play the game, "make three statements about yourself, one of which is true" and we had to guess the false one.  That got bogged down when Sister Sudweeks described how her husband rescued her from a Burmese Python that had gotten loose from their teenage son's room and was very large!!  Nobody could top that and it was getting late.  Pam and the Hunts, my favorite missionary couple, had to go home, but we stayed up with the Sudweeks playing Quitrkel (?) which was really interesting.  By then I was a bit dazed because I had been unable to sleep Christmas Eve at all (!!) and I couldn't even catch a nap before everybody came ( I always get so angry with myself when I can't sleep).  We thought our little party was a great success! 

 

However the best part of the day to me was that each of my children made an effort to call me to wish me a Merry Christmas, and I got to talk to them for a little while each.  I miss them all, but I know they had a great time together, even without me!          
There was another party (“tis the season”...) on Monday night after work for the senior missionaries, which everyone attended. Ususally, once a month, the senior missionaries have a FHE together, usually at the President's home. Because the Ahlander's were hosting their family from home, we decided to have all of us go out for dinner together. We decided on Outback Steakhouse (I was not really consulted, but delighted!). It was really a fun time, and the best food!! The Outback here, near the ERC is the best I have ever been to!! I ordered my favorite, though expensive (we literally never do things like this in the mission, so I wanted to take advantage of the opportunity!) Victoria filet (the 6oz one which seemed as big as 8oz steaks I've seen Corky get), and it was so perfect! I even splurged and got a tiny dessert! I sat across from the Hunts, who work in the office, and it was so much fun getting to know them. He is really hilarious and she is angelic (just as nice as she can be). It was an altogether lovely evening and I hope we can do this more often that every three months (!).
                                                                        

 

OVER CHRISTMAS IN LAS VEGAS

 

My goodness, so much to do and think about here, and this will be a hodgepodge of experiences and thoughts.  To add to the excitement, Min is really coming along in the discussions and the elders invited me to come to tonight's appointment and bear my testimony about the importance of Church attendance in receiving answers to prayers.  I can't wait!!  Anyway, if I can remember it all last week right after the Mission Christmas party at about the same time that I realized that Heavenly Father had softened the hearts of those I work with toward me (there is no other explanation--it certainly not me!),  two young women came into the office from a DI referral, who were very special.  They were obviously very close friends, one, Aquilla, was the "mentor" or leader (she was black), while Marissa, the white person, was the one receiving help.  They made it clear that the Savior had rescued them from a aberrant life of drugs and they felt "saved."  While I was registering Aquilla (Marissa was already registered), we talked about the reality of Christ's Church, and I told them about how things were done in His LDS Church (that all the services they were receiving were the result of consecrated money and time by members of the Church, who gave out of their love for the Savior and their brothers and sisters).  As I talked about the Church and some of the principles of the Gospel, I could tell they were impressed, so I asked if "they would be willing to learn more about His Church." (The wording of this is very important, as anyone of us can further His work of salvation by asking prepared--even minimally--non-members this innocuous question.).  They immediately said "yes" with enthusiasm, and we all hugged (several times--they really liked my hugs!).  I sent a referral to the Mission Office, of course, but learned they might be in the other mission (they are right on the border), so I made sure I let them know I wanted to participate, if possible, with the missionaries.  Anyway, it doesn't end there, because the next Monday,  Dec 23, I saw a flyer about a job hiring event that came late the day of the event, and called both of them to tell them about it.  I wasn't sure they could even make it, because they told me it would be over shortly in that morning, but Marissa came in later in the day for help.  What struck me  was the change in her in the short time since she came in Friday.  She had come in that Fri looking discouraged with clothes that were threadbare, and I could tell she was depressed and feeling hopeless.  She left much encouraged and happier, but when she came in Mon, she looked and acted like a new person: hopeful, and ready to take charge of her life.  She needed help with her resume, and there was little time before we closed.  I don't usually want to do this, but she was so excited and hopeful that I wanted to help her the best I could. Usually, I ask everyone  I help to prepare their own resume or at least the skeleton of one, and then I help them with language and formatting.  She, however, had nothing prepared and she couldn't remember much of what she knew she had done and when.  This was the most high pressure I have been under to date, as we worked feverishly to complete it before we closed!!  I have learned a lot about formatting on the computer, but I am not as sure-footed at Sister Splain and Sister Clark, and was grateful when Sister Splain was able to lend a hand several times when I forgot how to do something.  We finished it, but everybody had gone home, except Shawn, the manager who locked up the building, when I finally got her several copies.  Her gratitude and hugs were reward enough for me. 

LIFE'S LESSONS IN THE ERC

After writing about the relationship  problems I have been having, and having received an answer to prayer, I found the next several days here were worse, if posssible. In fact, I daren't write what I was thinking, as I was ready to “run away.” However, I just kept remembering the admonition of the Spirit to be “meek,” and I tried not to “answer back” to anyone who sharply criticized me or corrected me or ordered me to do something (with no “please” or “thank you”). I tried to smile and do what was asked or say nothing and get busy with tasks in the office that needed to be done. Then, last week, right after the Mission Christmas party, which was really wonderful, there was a complete change. I was treated completely differently, with respect and kindness. If I had not experienced it, I never would have believed it—and I knew that Heavenly Father had softened some hearts. I knew, then, that He is so mindful of me and He loves me so much, and that I will serve Him here for as long as He wants me here.

The Christmas party was huge, with 250 elder and sister missionaries! There were some humorous and some serious talks and music, and it was a good time. After President and Sister Ahlander spoke, there were some special musical numbers by the missionaries as well as a cute “reader's theatre” about the Nativity and some of the less well known participants, like the donkey. It was really quite funny, but in a reverent way. The dinner was absolutely wonderful—and each of us was served by the mothers of missionaries in the stake. They went to a great deal of trouble to wrap gifts for each of the young missionaries. Then we watched the movie, Ephraim's Crossing, which I had never seen. The party went later by an hour than was scheduled, and I was to go with the elders to visit one of our wonderful candidates, who had told me she wanted to learn more about the Church, Min. We were very far away from our appointment and I had to take Sister Clark home first, so we left as soon as the movie ended and I just barely made it to the meeting place. Because of mission rules, single sisters can't go with the elders to teach (unless there is an extra elder or we go to the chapel). I picked up Min and followed the elders to the ward chapel. These elders were so inspired, and the Spirit was there the whole time. I tried to add some things to help clarify when she looked confused. Her English is very good, but she still doesn't understand everything, and she prefers to read in Mandarin or Cantonese. I could see how the Lord had correlated this whole experience for her benefit. First, the sweetest -spirited young elders, one of whom was familiar with Mandarin, though he didn't speak it. Then, as we were teaching in the foyer by the door, people came into a scout meeting, one of whom, was a neighbor and friend to Min (!), and the elders said there was another Cantonese-speaking woman in the ward that could help her understand sacrament. Everything is by design and His hand is in every good thing. In the visit, the elders challenged her to be baptised right off the bat, which surprised me. She didn't know what to say, so I said that if she found what they were saying was true, she would want to be baptised, wouldn't she? She said she would want to be baptised when she was sure it was true. She prayed for the first time, and it was so sweet. It was clear she had little concept of God in her life, and, as she confided to me when I brought her home, she needed someone to”lean on”. I hope she prays to know the truth about what she heard. I know she felt the Spirit as I certainly did.

 

 

RED LETTER DAY IN THE ERC!!

 

 

I had such a great day on Friday this week (actually Dec 12 and 13), and it all started when I forgot my computer cord on Thursday.  Usually when there are few or no new candidates coming in and/or they don't need any help, we make phone calls to those on our list that receive "center assistance" with their job search.  Those who prefer to work on their own and those who have gotten jobs are placed (by us or themselves) on "self serve" until or unless they request more help.  We call the people on our lists to find out how they are doing and how we can help.  We use our computers to record all the notes that go into our data base on each candidate.  Without a computer we are up a creek.  So on Thursday, I tried to make myself useful by making sure the resource papers were up to date and  sufficient, pencils sharpened, note paper available, etc.  Then I got the new job emails that come in every day to our manager, Sean, and duplicated , highlighted and dated them to put into our two  "current listings" books.  I had an idea, because there were so many new postings.  Actually, Sean was out of the office for important meetings--they are making so many changes in the whole program (that are really inspired).  Since he is usually there to go over and print up the listings, they kind of piled up.  There was just a large variety of job postings, and I thought about all the candidates that I had met and helped to register and use our web site.  I got my little black book where I write, or try to re-write from scratch paper, all the names, phone numbers and desired jobs and skills of these people.  I decided to just try to find some of my names to fit some of these positions, and then I called them individually--at least some of them--to let them know about these new openings.  Some of them had found jobs (I congratulated them and recorded the job placements--we depend upon having placements to justify our existence).  However, several of them were very excited and were coming to the center to find out more.  One, a really nice brother I met early in my mission, sounded very discouraged but was much encouraged by my call and said he would be come the next day and follow up on some of the leads I could give some information about on the phone.  On Friday he came in very happy and excited.  He had gotten a new very good job that would help him provide for his family!!  He hugged me and thanked me over and over, but really, I hadn't done anything--he had just felt enough encouraged to go in the apply for a job he was very much qualified for--he'd done it all himself (as I pointed out).  He said he would help us know about any other openings in the company, and I suggested that we could have all our candidates who found jobs help us that way as well.  Of course, it was suggested in the past, but now it will be part of our resources, which should help many more people.  Then, the lovely Keywanda I had helped to register the day before, came in and also wanted to know about the jobs I called her about.  She called me to thank me and her new employer (a private party) also called to thank my for bringing them together.  Keywanda was very excited because she did not have a GED or high school diploma and it is almost impossible to find anything in that situation.  I found some info on sources of free help with the GED, which also should help.  Anyway, I called a number of people and felt that I was able to encourage them to keep looking--that the jobs were out there and we could help, and I felt I had done something good for a few people, which makes it all worth all the effort.

 

 

SOME HUMBLING MOMENTS IN THE ERC

 

 

As I might have written before, this mission has been  tutorial in learning to have a more Christ-like attitude, as my weaknesses have come up against various trials.  I have felt the stinging pain of sharp criticism and rebuke, when I have made mistakes, and the subtle discomfort of rejection when I feel  I am not liked or accepted--that my personality is somehow out of sinc with everyone else.  Sometimes it is hard to bear, but then the Spirit enlightens me on what I need to understand and what I need to change about myself.  Before I left, I kind of thought I was an OK person and generally liked by people who knew me.  Since I've been here, I have come to learn of so many parts about me that need repentance.  I was told (without tact, I felt) at various times, that I was selfish and self-centered, impulsive and thoughtless, and something of a liar, and that was just to start!!  However, after I was able to pray and ponder about these things, I saw myself more as Heavenly Father sees me, and could see more about my weaknesses.  I have been very much about myself, my life, my interests, my comforts, etc., and I need to think more of others and put myself last, in the same way the Savior does.  He didn't demean Himself or take on a co-dependent role, but He had at the front of His concern, the needs of all of us.  Without becoming co-dependent to their needs, I have tried harder to be more quiet and listening to everyone with whom I talk, and have subordinated my needs to those of others around me.  I am taking more time and exercising patience in my work (even if I already know what people are telling me and am already doing it "right"), and I am more careful and meticulous.  I guess the most painful realization was when someone called me a liar (I've never been called that--but then, I have never associated with people so direct !).  As I went to bed in tears, I prayed to know what to do, say, etc. (hoping, of course, I would magically be transferred to American Fork, where I could do this same mission without all this "wasted" time and misery).  It came to me very clearly, as He always sends me information, that I am indeed not completely truthful (though maybe not quite the "liar" I felt accused of being!).  I realized that when I was very young, I watched my mother mislead my father about what was true in order to avoid angry words (Dad was always completely straightforward, if sometimes brutally direct).  She considered it an art--kind of "what he doesn't know won't hurt us if he doesn't get angry about it"--and she wasn't worried about the broader problem of dishonesty.  I also realized that, to avoid any kind of confrontation or unpleasantness, I  developed the habit if just leaving the scene of the possible dispute  or cause for tension, as I find those feelings quite unbearable (that "walking on eggshells" feeling I feel so much here).  However, here I can't escape, run away or hide.  So, I have resorted to kind of avoiding the issues, waffling around the problems, and misleading by omission.  Because I am not really good at this, I find myself tripping up.  To give an example, I often find being around the other older sisters difficult and uncomfortable, especially when I drive them, because I feel their displeasure in things I do and usually find myself criticized or reprimanded like a child, though I am mostly the same age.  To avoid this, instead of just saying  " I don't think I want to go ", I will make weak excuses, and, usually,  because I am so tense and anxious, I develop stomach pains, but, by the time I can honestly tell them that I don't feel well, they don't believe me (and that wasn't the real reason anyway).  I went back and thanked them for what they said and let them know that I realized they were right and why.  It was a very good moment for all of us, as I finally actually felt their caring for me and mine for them.  I am trying to be more forthright, but still kind, in my conversation and this is beginning to really help our relationship.  Only Heavenly Father could have known how much I needed exactly this situation to help me repent and change.  As always, He has all of us in mind all the time (the Ultimate Multi-tasker!!).  Sometimes, however, the criticisms to which I cannot become accustomed, are truly unjust. I went to bed, praying for help.  The next morning, it came to me very clearly that I was not the only one being tutored and that this was for everyone's learning and growth.  I was told that I needed to become more like the Savior--the word I heard was "meek".  Meekness is not a particularly popular trait in this world, but I realized that that is just what I need to be.  A meek person, the Spirit made clear, not only does not "answer back", he doesn't even take offense , and is able, through the help of the Spirit (no one can do this without Him), to not even feel hurt or offense, but to feel only love and understanding toward the one giving criticism.  I would really like to be able to give the Savior a "meek" heart for Christmas! 

On Saturday, I had a nice time walking in the Spring Preserve, though with a touch of guilt because I had already made these plans and didn't want to go to the Temple with the other sisters (I love to go to the temple, but wanted to go in the PM after walking--they had already made plans for the PM).  Anyway, in the afternoon, I drove all the sisters to the Bellagio, amid a storm of criticism about my driving (which I ended by simply saying that it was tough enough to drive in the impossible traffic with the sun right in my eyes and be criticized at the same  time).  Anyway, we had a great time looking at the amazing decorations made with real flowers (polar bears made of 10,000 flowers each and a life-sized Santa house made entirely of chocolate and candy, plus thousands of pointsettas) and getting our gelato ice cream (wow).  Then, again with some complaints and back-seat instruction from all, mostly contradictory, we drove south for some distance to the "cactus garden", and it was simply show-stoppingly beautiful!  I have never seen so many lights together of such variety on each cactus plant and all the trees.  We loved it and traced the heavily traveled path with thousands of others to the end, where we went into a chocolate factory (Ethel M).  We saw how the chocolates were made and were given a sample (decadent!).  So, we left with a chocolate bar each, courtesy of Sister Houseman, the only one to bring a purse (who looks for chocolate factory in a cactus garden?)  To add to the fun, I noticed the irony of the blow-up plastic Christmas decorations in the midst of a cactus garden!    Anyway, we had a good time and arrived home around 8PM.  At nine, the two young sister missionaries came in our apartment and told us they couldn't get in theirs, because the key set was faulty (they had told the management about the problem but nothing had been done).  I felt so bady for them and we tried to get hold of someone, finally, successfully.  While talking to them, I asked how their day had been.  They said it was a "good" day, and I asked if they had found someone to teach (they have had very few teaching appointments and none in the last several weeks or I would have gone with them).  They said no, that they had helped someone to move out of their apartment.  I felt instantly humble by their goodness--that "helping someone move" was a  " good day" to them, while I was having "fun" not even trying to be  of service.  Their words and their attitude has continued to replay for me, as I realize I have so much more to learn to be more like the Savior.

 

 

ADVENTURES IN THE ERC  PART 8

 

I have been here in this mission for enough time and have met so many new people that I am beginning to forget some of those I have registered and helped, although I wrote many of their names down (with their employment preferences--in case I come across any jobs in their fields).  Plus, many adventures are happening this month, what with the Mission Conference with a General Authority and our Mission Christmas party, coming up this week and next.  So I am just going to tell about this day, which hasn't finished yet (it is 2pm and not much is going on).  So far, I have registered two new people to our website, one a member who is fully active in the Church and is seeking outside employment for the first time in years, Meghan.  Her dream job is to be a paramedic, but she is looking for employment to help pay for her education.  She had done "nanny"  work for  many years and is interested in finding a position in customer service.  There are thousands of customer service jobs available, according to the website, though likely many are filled, and other related jobs in our "jobs book", so, hopefully, she will be successful.  The second lady who came in was Keywanda, who was born in Louisiana, but lived 43 years here.  As I was talking to her while she registered, I sensed that she might be interested in the Church--she is a non-member.  I told her some things about the Church and why I love it and it must have resonated with her, because she said she wanted to join!!  She was tired on being "in the world" and "it was time" for her to become part of a church.  I got her information and, with her permission, after she left, I brought her referral down to the mission office (this is the third person I have actually referred).  I am excited to learn how she feels about the Church and asked if I could be part of teaching the discussions, if possible.

 



 

 

HERE COMES CHRISTMAS IN THE ERC

 

 

Here we are in December, already, and facing Christmas in the mission field.  I, for one, am not too dismayed, though I will miss my family.  This is all about serving the Savior (my choice) and serving others here, so I am feeling the Spirit of Christ--the best feeling of all--without all the hustle and bustle of the "season".  Many of the family will be together with Traci at her home (Bobbie and Ashton and David), Danny and Corky will be with Dan, perhaps with Dan and Noelle, and Laurel will have a great family Christmas in San Antonio.  I am excited that Dane and Noelle will be coming this way at the end of the season to come to a farewell for Dane's grandparents (going to Guatemala on their mission) in Cedar City.  They said they would come down on Sat (Dec. 28) and visit me!  In the meantime, I had another wonderful visit with my dearest friend, Mindy Webb, who came from Bainbridge to visit McKay!!  She and Stan and McKay came to see me and took me to lunch, and I was so excited to see them!!  We talked and laughed and the time passed so quickly, I was sorry to see it end.  I take it one day at a time and I have found so many big and little blessings that come to me each day, no matter how difficult it is over-all. I just received a lovely card from Andrea and Ron, which really touched my heart, and a big scroll of paper that was sent from the ward, I think, with lots of happy and supportive little notes from children, teens and adults!  I feel so loved right now, and then, wouldn't you know it, a wonderful (heavy) Christmas package from Traci with some of the most beautiful pictures of the children--I started to cry to see their beautiful faces-- and lots of fun things and, right here in the ERC comes a huge flower arrangement from Noelle and Dane.  My goodness, I am really overcome with gratitude for the goodness of all my friends and family and the love of God, manifested so clearly to me.  Last night I traveled with Sister Splain and Sister Houseman to an incredible performance of the Nativity, done for the whole valley by Church Stakes in this area.  It was a musical drama with a "host" of angels that appeared on the roof of the building above the nativity, singing  "Angels We Have heard on High" that made me feel like what it might have been like at Bethlehem!!  It was really dramatic with the majestic version by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir  (accompanying them in the background).  The donkey carrying Mary across the stage (which was actually a street on the campus) halted and refused to continue (even tho his friend, another donkey,  was across from him--which I am sure was pre-planned to give him incentive to go all the way to the door of the "inn").  Compelling  him to go wouldn't work, so Joseph helped Mary down and they continued on foot to the inn door(s).  Meanwhile, I watched  the donkey's handler go up to the donkey and  whisper in his ear and scratch under his chin, and then quietly lead him across the stage.  To me, this was a type of the Savior, who never compels but entreats, and was so appropriate for the evening.   

 

BEING REMEMBERED  BY THOSE LEFT BEHIND

 

 

 

I was absolutely astonished to receive two packages from wonderful friends back home!!  I couldn't

believe that the Van Dyke family sent me a lovely little box in a larger box--so cute-and the most heart-warming Thanksgiving card.  Each member of the family had written a little supportive and loving note in the card, and I cried when I read it and felt their love--and Heavenly Father's love for me, as I know that the Spirit moved them to reach out to this old and somewhat lonely missionary.  It was simply unbelievable to me that someone, not actually family, would even take the time to do this.  Then, in the next  mail, which came to the office, there was this big box for me from Janice and Steve Graham.  Inside there was a lovely shiney Christmas tree decorated with intricately cut out  decorative squares with inspiring scriptures about the Savior.  It was so incredible and just what I need--I keep reading the scriptures during the day and it strengthens me spiritually from the everyday troubles.  All this reinforces the realization that we missionaries are very much dependent on the prayers and support of those we love at home.  Bless you wonderful friends!

 



 



 

 

ADVENTURES OUT OF THE ERC !!

 

 

This week was Thanksgiving!  I was so excited, because the ERC is closed for Thanksgiving for a total of 4 days.  Three of my children, Danny, Corky, Bobbie, and her son, Ashton, came down to see me!   Danny and Corky came first, and it was wonderful to see them!!  I had permission to go down to stay with them at the resort (an extra bed), and we were soon joined by Bobbie and Ashton who literally flew down in her car (less than 5 hours to Las Vegas Blvd).  We met at our favorite restaurant, Outback, and had a wonderful meal, talking and laughing together.  I can't tell you how being with them has filled my soul.  Although they tried to get a bigger accommodation, like a 3 bedroom suite, they had to settle for what they could get at the last minute.  Bobbie got a studio for her and Ashton, while Danny and Corky had a  one bedroom (king), so I stayed on the Murphy bed in the living room.  It was very spacious and fun to be together, and we all had breakfast in "our" unit, which Bobbie lovingly prepared.  We decided to see a few "sights" and went to the aquarium at the Silverado and then the lovely duck and bird park in another casino.  We enjoyed both and should have just come home and gone swimming, but we wanted to see the fountains and the botanical display at the Bellagio.  Big mistake--were caught in bad traffic and stood still forever.  We decided to get out of there as soon as possible and  found we could drive up to the Circus-Circus.  After parking what turned out to be as far as possible from where we wanted to go, we found the whole place packed with wall to wall people like us.  Bobbie wanted to see the circus act which took us walking all the way through the casino and then we waited in the thick crowd with no seats available (except I sat in the midst of a group who made room) for about 10 or 15 minutes for the act to begin.  The performance was fairly good, but not worth the time and trouble, and we went back to the time share resort too late to swim, go to the movie, Girl on Fire, and have Thanksgiving dinner.  We still had not decided where to go for dinner together, but thought to go to one of the famous buffets.  We discovered that most were around $50 each (!), so we weren't sure what to do. Meanwhile, we all loved going to the movie, which was one of the best of the year.  We had heard that there was a less expensive buffet in that casino, but, when we looked at the long lines, we knew (what with food that was breathed and coughed on) that this would not be a good family experience for us.  We went back to the resort and wished we had bought a turkey and cooked it!!  But we were together and happy, so we just decided to find someplace for dinner--off the beaten path.  The resort, for some unknown reason, had recommended this place, BEE-GEES, across the street,  We went in and decided there was really nothing to recommend it!! It was a smoke-filled bar with a few drunks who welcomed us to their party!  Bobbie was inspired at this point and said we ought to go to the Cannery, another casino , further north (not too far from my apt).  By the time we got there, the buffet was closed, but we were undaunted and walked up to another little restaurant in the same casino which was open. It was called The Waverly, and we might not have even noticed it.  It was really a different world inside, and all the lights and smoke and noise just disappeared behind a partition where we were seated in the best table in the place!  It was extraordinary!  The food was wonderful (we even ate and prized the left-overs!), the best we had had, and the service impeccable.  It was quiet and lovely and intimate with all of us thoroughly enjoying the food and the company--and very thankful for these wonderful moments.  What a great day!  The next morning Danny and Corky had to drive home for Corky's  job, so we had a brief breakfast and sadly said goodby.  Luckily, Bobbie was staying through until Sunday.  Because she was in a studio which is very small, I drove home to spend the night at my apartment on  both nights.  On Friday, I took Ashton to the Spring Preserve for a couple of hours and then back to the resort, where we all went in the water--hot tub (huge) and pool (heated, but not hot).  We thoroughly enjoyed out time.  We ate leftovers (delicious!) and wanted to go back up the strip to see the "bodies" exhibit at the Luxor.  It was quite expensive, but interesting, if a little creepy.  Reading about the human body and its amazing qualities really helps grow my testimony of the divinity of the creation of man.  On Saturday, we just spent the whole day playing at the resort and didn't try to go where all the crowds were!  We swam, hot tubbed, rode the lazy river, played hide and seek, Ping-Pong, pools (the table kind), board games (like Uno, candyland, monopoly) and ate delivered pizza (the pizza was good, but the salad was ruined by the awful salad dressing).  It was so fun to be together and I went home late.  The next day, Sunday, Bobbie and Ashton came and stopped on their way home, but didn't stay very long (sigh!).  It was so supportive to me to have them come.  I thought I might be very homesick after they left, but I only felt strengthened, and I felt Heavenly Father had given me another special blessing (the happy kind).  

 

 

ADVENTURES IN THE ERC PART 7 ( OR SO)

 

 

 

Since Saturday is our "P" day, often the other three sisters and I go on sight-seeing outings.   Sister Splain has been here the longest and all the three have already seen many of the sights, but they have a "bucket" list of things to see before they each go home.  Although we don't go out every Saturday, we have seen a number of interesting sights.  The first Saturday I was there, we went to the Las Vegas Spring Preserve.  It was really interesting and even interactive with lots of history, an animal habitat, a large museum of Nevada (with a wonderful display of meticulously made clothing--these craft displays are changed periodically), a fantastic café, a trail system and "railroad" ride for tourists over a large acreage, and the most notable botanical garden in Nevada.  Since the visitor tickets were very expensive and the season passes were only $10 more, I opted to buy one, thinking I could come on my own to "hike" on the trails.  I was frustrated when I was told later (after I helped everyone get in for less than half price) that we all have to be together and I am not supposed to go alone. Plus, the others said they probably not want to do again (!!). However, I was just granted permission to go there to hike alone,  so I will look forward to doing that soon.  In the last few weeks we have gone to other places of interest.  Sister Splain took me to the Red Rock Canyon area I had heard so much about!  Both Sister Clark and Sister Houseman stayed home, the two of us took a picnic and drove the whole circle that goes through the area.  We stopped at all the rock formations and walked along some of the trails for a short distance.  It was, as the Spring Preserve, lovely in a deserty sort of way--the rocks were really impressive.  Unfortunately, it won't be a good option for me, because it is much farther away than I was told and it involves a very high fee for out-of-state cars every time you come (there is only one road that circles the area and it starts and ends at the fee station!)   Sister Splain and Sister Houseman also took me to the Valley of Fire one Saturday, and it was quite interesting, too.  Because of Sister Houseman's hip arthritis, we didn't hike very far or much, but it was quite fun.  We had a nice picnic in the shade of the canyon in a slightly hidden area and drove over the whole very vast land.  Again, there is one road that goes through the area and few that access the road.  We were going to go to another spot to see the big-horned sheep come down, but there had been an accident (motorcycle) ahead and the only road was closed.  We had to go all the way around and north to the freeway to go home, but we had so much fun in Overton, a tiny town with a big ice cream shoppe!  We got our ice cream and sat on the benches facing the street, three missionaries sitting in a row!!   All four of us also had a trip to the strip last week.  We went to Caesar's Forum which was really neat, but the best was the Bellogio (sp?) where they had the most beautiful display for fall ever.  It was huge and covered with fall flowers, pumpkins, trees, fountains, a little bridge, etc.  We went in to the ice cream shop and enjoyed one of the best-tasting (and expensive!) ice cream cones I have tasted.  We also drove (forever) to a movie theatre (in a casino--it seems, everything here is) to see the Saratov Approach, excellent and thought-provoking, and spent what seemed like hours in a shopping mall (I'm just not a fan of "shopping" or "malls".  We are also planning to go to a number of other places of interest (like Hoover Dam) in the future.  As soon as I can learn how to download pictures from the computer, my email, and my camera, and how to edit this blog to fit them in, I will put a few pictures about some of these and other events. 

ADVENTURES IN THE ERC PART 6

One of our candidates came in with a big smile on her face this morning while I was at the front desk. Coila (an unusual name!) is someone I've spent lots of time with over the weeks, and she happily reported that she had found a job!! We were all excited for her and rang the bell and clapped. She stayed to work on the paperwork her company required. The first time I saw her was when I was walking around the whole complex, as per instructions by my chiropractor to get my body acclimated to my new routine. She was sitting with her head down smoking outside the DI where she was interning. Later, when she was about done with her training and the CNA training she was getting, she came in to the office to register on the website. She spent weeks coming in every day, looking for job openings and putting in applications. She was often out of sorts, but I felt that Heavenly Father's love for her was great and I did my best to show her love and encouragement. Because of that, she would seek me out for help and hugs. It was so good to learn of her new job, and I didn't even smell tobacco when I hugged her!!

ADVENTURES IN THE ERC PART 5

There have been so many “candidates”, members and non-members who I have registered and/or met since I started in Oct. It will be Thanksgiving this Thursday, so it will be almost two months since I started all this. I have now helped four people complete their resumes!! Last Friday a young man named Bryce , who has been working at DI completing job training, came in for some help. He really could not put his thoughts (or his skills) down on paper, so I kept asking questions and writing down information. I helped him write a very engaging (if I do say so, myself) “me in 30 seconds” personal profile paragraph, which should be attractive to potential employers. Then, using the experiences of his life, his training at DI and some other skills he had used (but didn't realize, like leadership), I helped him word his “skills and accomplishment” part of the resume. We added the meager employment history at the bottom along with the sketchy education. It looked really great, and earned actual compliments from our resident experts, Elder Theiss and Sister Splain!! I hope it helps Bryce get an interview. I have also helped several other people in this way. The first, Ethel, was a lovely lady from Jamaica who had mostly worked as a Nanny and had little formal education. It was such a challenge to find a way to make her skills and accomplishments appear more impressive, but, when we finished, it was quite good and will help her get a good interview, I hope (at least, my mentor, Sister Splain felt it was as good as it could be). Because of this, Sister Splain has “fed” me several more people who need this kind of help, the last being Bryce, and I have continued to improve. It is so fun getting to know these people better, and they are so grateful for the time and care we take. Richard is an older slightly mentally challenged man, who has been a good Church member all his life and is descended from the pioneers. I helped this sweet man to register and realized he was really mentally challenged. I still encouraged him to take the career workshop, which he did, and he began to grow in confidence, although his writing skills were lacking. I sat down with him and helped him identify his strengths and skills and keyed them toward the job he was seeking. I completed his resume much faster than Ethel's and he loved it (as did Sister Splain). We haven't heard from him yet, but he was going for an interview. I'm hoping he is too busy working to come in to tell us! The third resume was much more challenging. Eder, a young very motivated and intelligent (with great organizational skills) but with no English skills (in writing), was my most difficult. I really had no idea what he wrote in the wordy resume he showed me, but it clearly needed to be put it a better format. He also explained in broken English, some of the projects he had managed and they helped to build an impressive resume, after I rephrased some of his managing skills to his advantage. His completed resume was so good, it got him three interviews and job offers!! I was so happy for him. He came in, though, because he thought he might want to start a family business with his father and brothers—and he had all the information and projected expenses on paper! He must have thought I had more knowledge about self-employment than I do (which is next to none), but I encouraged him that he could probably do anything with all his talent, but he would have to choose which way to go. I asked him if he had prayed about his plans, and told him some of my experiences with answered prayers, letting him know that I felt God had an active interest in his choices!! He looked so happy and said that that was what he had come here to learn that day, and he would pray to know Heavenly Father's will in this. He also said that he loved my resume so much he wanted me to help with his brother's, which he left with me!! I told him to have his brother come in and I would do my best. I don't believe it is good to just “ do” any resume without their help and active participation. Our goal is to help them become self-sufficient, not dependent on us!

 Tonight I received an inkling about what Heavenly Father is trying to do with me to help me become more fit for the kingdom and it is nothing I would have thought (except now it is becoming so much clearer).  It is very hard to put in words, I have just a vague understanding yet, but my eyes filled with tears when I began to realize how perfect His plan is.  I'm learning daily how my efforts fit His purposes, but now I am beginning to see how He is trying to transform me into a person who can relate to and love His children.  Of course, I can pray to feel His love for His children, but He wants my heart to grow in my own ability to love (and relate to) others, instead of running away (psychologically and/or physically).  Because of painful experiences from a child, I have avoided closeness, trust, intimacy with other people, and I  have felt very alone--safer than the pain, I guess.  Most people who know me wouldn't guess that this is the case, but I know it and have suffered because of it for years.  The reason this mission is literally "wrenching" me apart is that He is trying to help me come back together whole and healed.  This will be His gift to me, I believe, because I have been willing to do His will, which is so different from my natural inclinations. I didn't think I could describe this--and I know it isn't very clear, even to me, but I feel I will learn more as I submit myself to His will.  These promptings came to me as we were watching the Forgotten Carols, a deep and unique spiritual perspective.  I could literally feel His gentle working with me.  Today was a really difficult morning.  I felt very "apart" from the other people working in the center and very lonely and of little worth.  I also was aware that the terrible weather here meant snow, glorious snow, in the mountains which I was missing.  It was almost as if He deliberately orchestrated this test of my faithfulness--we seldom have such great snow so early, and last year was not too great.  If I was really loving my mission, it would be of no consequence, but it has been a painful experience, mixed with indescribable joy.  Here I am and I can't escape from these difficult relationship issues and my own feelings of estrangement.  I have to learn to deal with it in a Christ-like way and become better and happier in the process, and I have made some progress today, as I came home so much more content and happy than I left, despite the fatigue from the day (and no sleep last night).  I'm sure this makes little sense, but perhaps it will as I learn and become more.

ADVENTURES IN THE ERC PART 3

Because we are officially missionaries from 8AM to 5PM at our employment “adviser job”, even though we are “full-time” missionaries, we have evenings, Saturdays (P Day) and Sundays to do as we see fit. Usually, in the evenings, we are so tired (and it is dark when we leave the office) that we don't do much more that prepare dinner and eat , have companion study, and get ready for the next day and for bed. We usually rise up around 5:30 AM to get ready for work. However, there have been some notable exceptions: namely, the Gladys Knight concerts! The one we went to was at our own building (still a good 15 to 20 min drive from our apt.) and we lined up over an hour before we were alllowed to go in (a new record for me, but, it was so worth it!). Because they had let in all those who were disabled and many non-members and their friends, we had to sit back behind the chapel despite the fact that we had arrived early enough to be well front of the line. Then, a friend of Sister Houseman, who was an usher, brought she and Sister Splain, her companion, clear up to the front! We were a little sad there weren't seats for us to be with them,  yet, our seats gave us  a great opportunity, even before the concert, to do fellowshipping with good people, There was a wonderful well-spoken black man and his wife in the seat next to me (Sister Clark and I didn't have seats together until later when they brought an extra chair). It was so fun to share the Gospet and lots of laughs with them, and I really felt they would love being members of the Church. We had so much fun talking I didn't notice the time, and there was quite a wait for the concert (which started quite late). Anyway, I told him about the neat gift they were going to give non-members of the Church if they filled out a referral (with a CD, DVD, and Book of Mormon), and they both laughed, but in a very welcoming way (felt they would like it). Anyway, when they announced about the referrals and the gifts, I told them that I saw “their” pen on the floor provided for that purpose, and they laughed again, but they filled out the form! Anyway, after the best concert I have ever been to, they thanked me and said they hoped they would see me again ( I told them to stop by our ERC!). It was really fun being there as a missionary!! The concert was amazing and quite indescribable. It was very entertaining, the group were very very professional, the singing was beautiful, fun, exciting and spiritual, but turns, and the testimonies were so touching and wonderful. I had a very strong impression as I sat in the midst of this heterogeneous group (as Gladys said, you look like ice cream, chocolate and vanilla!), that this is the time of the African races, here and around the world. You remember how different groups and races have come into the Church (remember the “day of the Lamanite” in President Kimball's time?), Well, I felt strongly that this wondrous group of happy and easy-going people were going to come in in droves, and their special traits would greatly bless the Church with fun and joy, as well as bless their people. I feel a particular sisterhood with these special brothers and sisters, and I feel very blessed to be part of this. Afterwards, there was such a spirit of brotherhood and people lingered to socialize, so we got home particularly late that night!!

ADVENTURES IN THE ERC PART 2

As I wrote before, we get to the office at 8AM in the morning, and we have a spiritual thought and prayer, which rotates around to all of us. Some of them are very touching or interesting (today, Elder Bunn told about the six different temple angels (Moroni) used at the top of the temples). There are a number of activities going on at once when we open (usually we open the doors at 8:30 because many of our candidates have to use public transportation (if they can afford that—some are homeless), even though we are “officially” open at 9AM.   Someone is always at the desk, the “con” (Elder Bunn described that person as in charge (or 'controller') of making sure our activites are “in order”. The front desk person is either very busy or not, depending on the people who come. This position is rotated throughout the day in two hour shifts that are posted for the month for each of us. Besides answering the phone, greeting (warmly) our candidates as they come in (asking to print clearly their names—they seldom do!), making sure they have someone to help them if they are new or need resume or other help, and, if we are not busy, she/he records the notes for those who came the day before. Every client has a file and there is a computer procedure for recording the notes and doing the “claim tasks” (this is when a new person is registered and his account is enabled and “welcome” letter is sent by email). There is another responsibility that was told to me when I came but I had never done it, because my shifts were usually later in the day. The first person at the desk is supposed to turn off the phone “night line” when he starts, so people calling in don't get the “after hours” message.   I was never shown the place on the phone where it is, and, though I looked on the phone, I couldn't find anything flashing (I thought they said "night light"!!). I wondered when there were no calls, but it was quickly discovered and explained and I was so embarrassed!

It has now been going on two months and there have been so many people who have come in. I have helped to register dozens and I honestly don't remember most of them, even though I tried to take notes on them, so I can keep my eye out for incoming jobs that they might want. Most of them come in just once to register and use their home computers to search for a job, come in to register just to satisfy their bishop's requirement that they look for a job before they get help, or find a job quickly on their own (with our counseling help!). Some we see almost every day as they work so hard to find employment. We are all excited (and ring a bell) when someone comes in to celebrate with us. There are some, however, who really touch my heart. One of my favorite ones was an older very dignified black man in his sixties, Paul, who was so pleasant and appreciative. He is not a member of the Church and was impressed that so much help was offered without charge. I registered him on our website, showed him all about the website (including links to other job sites, networking events, self-employment information, school and community job sites), and showed him all the jobs that have come directly into our center and are posted in our “job” books by date (latest at the front). He was extremely well qualified and well educated, especially in electrical installation and repair in heavy construction, and there were several openings he was quite over-qualified for that he seemed interested in. Then he told me that his big problem with some of the jobs more suitable for him was the mandatory background check, because somewhere in the distant past he had a felony.  He had obviously had a difficult life and was in combat during the Viet Nam War.   I was so surprised that someone so refined would have that problem, but he was quite sad about it so I just encouraged him that there was surely someone who would need his expertise. He said he was really impressed with the Center and commented about “something here” meaning something special. I talked about the Spirit and how this building was dedicated and consecrated for the Lord and His work. After he left, I found another possible job for him with a small (one man) electric company and gave him the number. I called him on the number in his profile and told him about it (we often do this for people we've come to know). He thanked me again and several days later, he called the Center to let us know he got the job (and to thank me—I was told, as I didn't get the call). I was so happy for him. Later, he came by to thank me in person, but I was not in the office (was in the back or running an errand to the Mission Office) and I was so sad I missed him, but, because he had such a special spirit, I felt impressed to refer him to the missionaries through the Mission Office, which is just down the building from us. 

ADVENTURES IN THE EMPLOYMENT RESOURCE CENTER PART 1

I am beginning to become proficient at the computer, something I never thought I would ever do or even  want to do. I want to start describing some of the adventures I've had in the ERC, and will try to do a weekly entry after this, but now I am going to try to recall experiences from the last month. When I first came to the office, there was so much to learn about how to do things. From the first, the best part to me was counseling with people who came in seeking employment. I was so impressed about how much help was available, that, in the ward Relief Society meeting (my new ward here), I shared briefly what the ERC had to offer (the lesson that week was on the welfare plan of the Church in connection with becoming self-sufficient..). I noticed a lovely young lady watching me intently and smiling, and later talked with her. She said she was trying to find a job and wanted to come in to learn about it. Her name was Debra, and, sure enough, the next day, during our brief devotional (spiritual thought and prayer), I saw her waiting outside our door. I got to register her on the website and show her how to access our resources. It was so fun and she hugged me as she left. I didn't realize she was not a member, just a friend visiting. Imagine how thrilled I was when I learned she had found a job—and so quickly! I learned this from the elders who asked if my companion and I knew a “Debra---”. And I said I had introduced her to the center. They said she was so grateful (and she later came down to the center to thank me, but I had just left for a couple of minutes).  I was so sad not to see her, but I was so happy that this blessing came into her life, and I know it's not about me, but about Him and everyone who serves countless hours here. In any case, she is being taught the gospel, and I asked if I could come to the lessons, but haven't heard back. I continue to pray for her and feel blessed to have participated in this small miracle.

Since Coming Here to My Mission...

I have been almost overwhelmed with my experiences here and all the new conditions of my life. I knew that this mission would be a test, but had no clue how difficult it would be. My life is so totally different from what it was before, which is causing a lot of homesickness, but there are lots of blessings here, too. Our apartment is really nice, for a missionary apartment, and is very roomy, equipped with all we need to live comfortably. There are beautifully landscaped courtyards inside each apartment cluster (in which the apartments are built around a square) and in every one there is a pool or hot pool. Ours is the largest courtyard with a large swimming pool, small nicely hot jacuzzi, and a playground. I can also walk from one courtyard to another and see a variety of landscaping trees, bushes and flowers. It is mostly more deserty , not tropical, but very well done. My bedroom, very large, has a nice bathroom, huge closet, and a patio door that opens onto the courtyard, with a tiny porch right outside the door. We are on the ground floor, so I can just walk out the door and look at the lovely trees as I walk. I often go for a walk around the courtyards on the cement paths that circle each. We leave from this to go to our assigned labor every morning at 7:454 AM and return some time after work which officially ends at 4:30 PM (or later, depending on whether we have a training or something else), so it's kind of like a regular job, five days a week. I have so much to learn about this, but I am making really good progress, even with my nemesis, the computers! In the center, we learn how to help “candidates” obtain jobs in a marvelously simple but effective way. When someone comes in for the first time, member or non-member, we help him or her learn what we are about, first of all. This is my most favorite part, because I have the privilege of greeting these people and helping them feel the love that our Savior has for them. While this is not a proselyting mission, we represent the Church as ambassadors of Jesus Christ, and are often the first “face” non-members meet. After we ask about their employment goals, we tell them about the importance of “networking” with others and groups which we have for this very purpose (70 to 80 per cent of jobs are obtained through networking). We invite them to go to some of the Church networking groups in the area, and we let them know that after they are registered on theldsjobs.org website, they will be able to see a lot of different job information. When we register them, the website opens up into several really useful places. First, we show them a place where they can fill out a job profile which is similar to a resume, but a bit more personal. It starts with a “me in 30 seconds” statement, which describes the strengths and abilities, and desires of the “candidate.” There are also a place to put six power statements with more details about their strengths. We explain that we have a valuable free workshop, the Career Workshop, where they can learn vital lessons that will help them obtain a job more easily. I have witnessed for myself how valuable this workshop is. First, they learn to accentuate their strengths, something many of them have forgotten in their despair about unemployment. They write their “me in 30 seconds” statements with our help, as well as “power statements” about themselves. They learn how to write a resume and, with our help, they leave with a good one. Also, a cover letter, how to dress, how to interview and what to say, and what not to say. We have “mock” interviews using commonly asked questions by employers and coach them on what to say. This workshop in invaluable in helping them. It was a private workshop which commanded thousands of dollars as a private course, but was given free to the Church to use for our “candidates.” Most serious “candidates” sign up for the course. We tell them that after they have completed 90 per cent of the “profile”, they can enable it to allow potential employers to see it. On the flip side, we also recruit potential employers to register in the website and look for candidates there, and we have a large number of companies registered (some owned by members of the Church, most, not). This is often a good way for candidates to find the right job. On the website are many helps and tips for the “candidates”, but they is much more. There is also a “search” box that helps them locate the latest job openings before most job-seekers see them, which are accessed by “keywords” and are listed by date, the most recent appearing first. Some of the jobs available are thousands in number!! In addition, we have put all the local and national (even international—we had a Canadian company come to the center to interview potential employers!) websites, including job sites, like Hot Leads, sites for work at home, community and government openings, job fairs, schools, and virtually every possible website, which they can click on and browse. We help them fill out applications, attach and or email resumes right there. However, the best thing is that they can use their own computers at home for the same purposes and come in for help any time. Most of those who come in to use our computers don't have computers (some don't have a home), or they also come in to look at the latest job listing that are emailed to our center and put in books (most recent in the first pages). We also keep track of everyone who comes in and registers. We phone and email every one who registers, especially as they come in and work with us. Even those we never see again, get calls and emails of encouragement until they find jobs. It is very intense at times—one day I was registering three members of a family at one time!! We have about 7 computers available all day. I love it when we are busy and I get to help lots of people (new and returnees), but then sometimes it is slow, which is much harder for me. Right now, I am still learning so many things that it fills the time, which is good for me, and there is a lot to learn. I love the opportunity of doing the Lord's work to encourage and give hope to people who often feel hopeless or worthless, letting them know they count and have wonderful things about them as God's children. I think that sometimes we see more non-members that a lot of missionaries!

This is several days later...Although my mission is essentially at the ERC (Employment Resource Center), just telling a little about what we do, leaves lots of stuff out. It is now a full month since I arrived here, and I can now tell about some of the difficulties which have been more or less resolved. I feel I have really turned a corner and am now re-committed to what I thought might be impossible for me to do. I think in the Church we try not to talk about all the difficult things that are part of a mission, so as not to seem of wavering faith, but during the first week, I thought I would have a nervous breakdown I was so conflicted. On the one hand, and I never lost sight of this, I wanted to serve the Savior who has, and continues to bless me so very much. However, everything about this mission was either a terrible shock or terribly uncomfortable from the start. I literally left everything that was familiar and a blessing to me from Heavenly Father (my home, my bed, my dogs, my wonderful family, walks in the garden, hikes in the mountains, alone time, meditation time, skiing in winter, my friends, my yard, chickens, climate I loved, visits to and from grandchildren (and children), good times, movies, TV shows with Danny—literally everything I loved—to come to a climate I hate, a city apartment, no mountains, no grass, few and small trees, people who have little sense of humor, a hostile companion who is as different from me as night and day and who is pretty set in her ways, critical, controlling, an office atmosphere that leaves me walking on eggshells because I felt so uncomfortable, no alone time, no fun food and no going out to eat (except at restaurants with horrible fast food, etc. I was devastated, and felt that I could not do this for more than a week or two without expiring! I tried to talk to my companion and being nice and deferential to those I work with, but I felt I was just not accepted or even liked. I prayed—cried every night—and begged him to let me go home. I couldn't sleep, sometimes several days in a row with no sleep at all, and began to feel ill. Part of the problem was that, as missionaries, I was told by the three sister missionaries, we are supposed to stay together, but I was informed by someone in Salt Lake, when I phoned after my call came, that the

rules are not as clear-cut for senior missionaries. However, my companion and the other senior lady missionaries feel we need to be together whenever we want to go somewhere, which has caused something of a delemna for me. I feel I need some alone time to walk and ponder (which I have depended on for most of my life as an opportunity to communicate with my Heavenly Father and get rid of excess frustration and/or anxiety). My companion, Sister Clark is a very good person and is 6 years older than me She is extremely talented in crafts, sewing, and homemaking, as well very well versed in the work we do in the ERC (employment research center), but she is disappointed in the fact that I am not too interested in crafts and want to walk in the nearby park (the closest thing I can find to what I need). . When I prayed about staying here for 23 months, I was in despair that I could do it. When I contemplated about what I felt I could do, the number 12, or 1 year came to my mind, but I was afraid to mention it out loud for fear that I would be even more despised as some kind of heretic. Finally, I knew I needed to talk to the mission president about all my concerns, including the feeling I had that I had traveled from a place I loved to one I hated to work only 8 hours a day, leaving 16 hours to be useless and miserable and homesick, when I could literally do what I was doing here in American Fork and still be surrounded by everyone and everything I loved (and do more good, I felt). I had clicked on the 23 on the computer when I really felt I should choose the one year option, but had not wanted to limit Heavenly Father's work for me. Because, as I later learned, they are short 50% of the seniors, I felt they had just “taken it” and not prayed about the length of time. Finally, I knew if I didn't talk to the President, I would just go home “in shame” rather than bear another miserable day.. I was so glad I did!! He was wonderful and so inspired, and I remembered the feelings I felt when I desired to serve the Lord. I told him I knew I could not be here 23 months and he asked how long I felt I could serve. I told him I could serve “one good year” (actually, by then, I wasn't sure I could serve even three months), and asked if he would pray for me about it and let me know what he learned. He replied, and I felt the Spirit confirm with kind of a “wind” feeling, that he didn't need to pray more about it, but that a year felt “right.” I was so relieved—I wouldn't have to run away after all, I could do this for a year! Then, to my joy, he said I needed to be more busy and use those extra hours going with the sisters to teaching appointments, and he would arrange that to happen in about two weeks!! I was so elated about this. The one thing that I did love about my mission was helping and fellowshipping those who came to the ERC, non-members and dismayed members, and I felt that I could feel Heavenly Father's love for them and encourage them to have hope, which is really hope in the Savior. He also said I should have “companionship inventory” with my companion, which I had already tried unsuccessfully. However, since that time, we have had our “inventory”, and it was wonderful. I learned much more about her and how she saw things, and I realized I had been mistaken about many things—and she seemed to find the same thing. Now, I feel, we are really close, and I think about being “one” with her—working together, rather than the urgency of my own needs, and I am sleeping better, and I don't even feel the urgency to walk like I did. Most of all, the very difficult technical knowledge I need to know in the ERC to even begin to really help those who are unemployed (which I haven't even mentioned yet,because it seemed so beyond me!), I am now actually learning! I have learned so many things and how to do them, and on Fri (Nov 8) I passed a milestone! I actually wrote out a resume (with lots of help with formating, filing, copying, emailing, etc.) for someone applying for a job. There are so many technical computer things you have to do, which was carefully—and patiently—explained to me by Sister Spain. But I actually wrote up most of it by myself! Now I am really learning why I need to serve this mission right here. I have learned so much about sharing, patience, putting others' needs before mine, and all the technical things I need to know, and I could never learn this in my comfortable home. I could never grow into the person Heavenly Father wants me to be without this painful stretching and changing in situations I have always been able to avoid!! And I am changing! I really love my companion now and we enjoy being together, but I am very careful to consider her and her needs and not just my own, and I like myself better. I am still somewhat uncomfortable in the office situation and feel not as accepted as I would like, like I need to “prove” myself before they will like or even accept me. However, it occurred to me that Heavenly Father is using a talent that I have had and wanted to use: I have a gift with words—I can chose words and phrases (and sentences) most appropriate and helpful to any situation, which really can help make a good resume, accentuating our “candidates” strengths and minimizing his/her weaknesses. Also, I can use my gift of Heavenly Father's love for each of His children, which He has enabled me to feel, to help people who come in feel loved and welcome. Not to mention that I will have the opportunity to help the missionaries soon, and partake of that incredible Spirit, helping to teach people. So, in effect, I feel that I will be able to do twice the work in half the time, but learning and doing the work in the ERC and helping teach Gospel lessons with the sister missionaries during the next year. If I grow to love it, I may want to extend, but I still feel I should be there for the year only, as there are more things He wants me to do.

My Mission to Las Vegas

I have already finished two weeks here in Las Vegas and am starting my third week, so I have really been remiss in writing this blog. It is all so new to me and so much to learn. I will begin at the beginning.

I went into the Senior MTC experience on Mon.,Oct 7. The evening before, with my family (everyone in the family here was there to support me (Danny, Corky, Noelle and Dane, Bobbie and James and Ashton), and the blessing given by my wonderful Stake President, President Livingston, was one I will never forget. I felt angels in the room and Heavenly Father's incredible love, as I was promised Heavenly support and direct communication from the Savior, as well as divine protection and help. I was also told that I would meet people who were waiting for me, and I would know them through the Spirit. I wish I could have had it all transcribed it was so beautiful and so spiritual. I discovered in Provo that most of the senior missionaries were wonderful couples, who were being sent all over the world. The schedule was not very demanding, with quite a bit of “down” time and an early (4PM) end. Because of this, and the charge for the room, I elected to go home each night, because I thought I would be lonely by myself for too many hours there. I finally got to meet the other two single sister missionaries, who became my companions in our classroom studies and role plays. The whole curriculum was based upon the “Preach My Gospel” book, though it only was able to cover a portion of the material in the five short days. I really came to love the sweet couples. It took a little longer to feel love for the sisters, as they didn't seem to be as warm (and a little defensive), but within a couple of days we were all much closer as we got to know one another. I came to realize that the couples were of much more value to the mission field than the senior sisters, who tended to be set in their ways and more difficult to relate to (at least for me), including the sisters here in Las Vegas. I did enjoy the MTC teachers and lecturers, who were all quite young (but very helpful). It was kind of hard to say goodby to them all at the end, knowing we wouldn't see eachother again.